The Gay Brain

I remarked earlier about homosexuals, and have come up with a theory on this.  I believe that gays have the cross-gender brain. 

 Anyone with any appreciable experience with the opposite sex knows that men and women think differently.  This is not cultural, but physiological.  In the womb, when our bodies form either penis & testicles or clitoris and ovaries, subtle changes are also taking place in our brains.  We end up with a male brain or a female brain. 

 Men tend to think in linear terms:  A therefore B therefore C, or 1 >> 2 >> 3.  Women think in non-linear terms:  A therefore 2 therefore Tuesday therefore purple.  What a man thinks follows from A is B; what a woman thinks follows from A is 2.  This is why men and women have so much trouble dealing with each other.  “Why doesn’t he know that M goes to cabbage?” cries a woman, whereas her husband says, “M goes to N, it’s logical…why can’t she figure that out?”

 The male brain is physiologically oriented to respond sexually to exposed breasts and vagina – the female anatomy.  The female brain is physiologically oriented to respond sexually to broad shoulders, strong arms, and even the penis.  Switch brains and you wind up with a man attracted to other men, or a woman attracted to other women.  However, there is at least one study that shows that straight women respond not merely to straight sex porn, but also gay porn.  Among men, only gay men respond to gay porn. 

 The gay man has a man’s body and a woman’s brain.  The lesbian has a woman’s body and a man’s brain.  This is why straight women LOVE to have gay male friends.  A man who thinks like a woman!  Brilliant!  And he won’t be offended if she doesn’t make a pass at him!  Even better.  Of course, this makes gay men a poor source of information on how straight men actually think.  What it’s like to pee standing up?  Ok, he can handle that.  What a straight man looks for in a woman?  Eh, not so much.  It’s funny, though – I don’t see straight men seeking advice on women from lesbians.  

 Note, it’s NOT genes.  Identical twins have a slightly higher chance of both being gay, but not much higher, and it’s not 100%.  On the other hand, if it’s due to hardwiring in the brain, it’s still fixed from birth and not something that can be changed with hormones, behavior therapy, or Elaine Benes.  To fix it you’d need an actual brain transplant (ideally trading with a lesbian). 

 As for bisexuals….  I can’t really say how they fit into my theory, which would be all-on or all-off (heterosexual or homosexual).  My own experience with the GLBS community is practically nil – “Modern Family” and not real gay friends.  Therefore, what I say in this regard may come off as uninformed.  These are just my own subjective impressions.

            I noted earlier that bisexuality among women is rarer than porn would have us believe.  “Bisexuals” seem less to be people truly ambivalent and neutral in their preferences, than either homosexuals occasionally engaging in straight sex for various reasons, or heterosexuals doing likewise, again for certain specific reasons.

Reasons such as:  suitable partners of the desired gender are not available (e.g. prison); or economic incentive (porn stars) or duress (heroin junkies).  

            In men, my impression is that bisexuals are really gay pretending to be bisexual because of some latent social, cultural (or possibly even physiological) confusion about their orientation.  These are homosexuals who occasionally dally in opposite-sex fun, but who mostly stick with their own team.  I’d call these “promiscuously bisexual.”

            Contrast this with what I call the “expediently bisexual”, (mostly) men who only engage in homosexual behavior when females are unavailable but are exclusively heterosexual when they do have access to women, the most common example being prison inmates.  Are they gays pretending to be straight in regular society?  Or just straight men with extremely low standards?   My guess is…the latter, with the promiscuously bisexual being homosexuals with low standards.  For all I know, maybe both groups contain individuals best described as “confused.”  But since I’m not bisexual – of either type – I may have to defer to true bisexuals on if and how their behavior fits into my “gay brain” theory.  I know my brain is straight.