New Cars and Rentals

The choice and selection of new cars these days (2013) is frustrating.  On one hand, with a new car, you do get the satisfaction of knowing you’re the original owner.  Everything is fresh and new – there’s even that disturbing plastic smell (which I really don’t like).   You have a factory warranty and the negligible likelihood of any problems – especially from an import.  And there are always new features being added each year, some of which strike me as “wipe-your-butt” and not that useful (e.g. reverse camera).   Of course you have to get used to the new controls and everything.

On a cold, rainy morning, November 22, 1992, I bought my first new car: a 1992 Pontiac Firebird, at King Pontiac in Gaithersburg, Maryland, near the corner of Shady Grove Road and 355.  It was black-on-black, with power windows, door locks, remote trunk release, and T-tops.   And it had a V8, although it was a 170 horsepower, throttle-body injected 5.0L.  Not NASCAR, NHRA or Indy car worthy, but certainly enough torque and oomph to get the car out of its own way.   I could pop the hood and count 8 spark plug wires, 4 on each side of the block.  The TBI was kind of weird: the same large circular air cleaner with snorkel you would expect on a carbureted engine, but this was fuel injected.   I could juice it up:  Mobil 1 synthetic oil, K&N air filter, Dunlop SP4000 tires, and a Hypertech PROM chip promising (!) another 30 HP.  I babied that car, and it was in stellar condition when I sold it to my boss in 1995 when I bought my Formula.  After a Cavalier and a Tercel – both boring, economy cars – finally I had my own car that I picked out myself.  It was MINE.

That night, when it got dark, I turned on the headlights, and the lighting was red, not green.  My dad was also impressed: it’s like the Batmobile, he said.  The pop-up headlights were also cool. 

Sadly, circa 2013, there is no Pontiac anymore, and Pontiac itself hadn’t sold a Firebird since 2002.  Chevrolet sells its Camaro, but even the V6 model is $26k, and the V8 SS model is $35k or more.  Although it’s obviously based on the ’69 model, the tiny windows are a symptom of too much modern and not enough retro. It also bugs me that the SS logo is off-center with the bow-tie still in the middle.  The original Camaro SS had the “SS” dead center in the grille.  For that matter, so did the Nova SS and Chevelle SS.

Dodge sells the Challenger: R/T with 5.7L Hemi (370 HP) is $30k, SRT8 with 6.1L Hemi (420 HP) is $40k.  The Challenger is an excellent copy of Dodge’s least attractive car, whereas the Charger – which also comes in the corresponding R/T and SRT8 configurations with similar engines and price tags – is a sedan.   Nope, they weren’t going to copy the ’68-70 model which narrowly lost to the ’68 GTO for Motor Trend car of the year.

The Nissan Altima – which I rented for some time – has impressive acceleration (even in the 2.5L model) and a killer stereo.  Too bad the styling gets an F:  indistinguishable from a Chevy Impala, Toyota Camry or Honda Accord.  Of the economy cars, I find the Honda Civic coupe to be the nicest looking of the 2013 crop.  It’s semi-sporty without being embarrassing. 

Rental Cars.  Part of the problem with rentals is by the time you get used to the controls and idiosyncrasies of the car, it’s time to turn it in.  And they never rent cool cars: sorry, the V6 Mustang and V6 Charger don’t do it for me:  please let us rent the GT and R/T models.   While I realize the insurance and business models heavily disfavor renting classic muscle cars, it’s a major shame that – to my knowledge – you can’t rent General Lee Charger R/Ts, ‘70s Trans Ams, ‘70s Corvettes, 60s GTOs, or similar cars.  Whoever manages to find a formula for that which works – possibly short-term rentals with some higher scrutiny of the prospective renter’s driving record and personality profile – could stand to make a considerable amount of money.  The image of a Hemi Road Runner wrapped around a tree and its 16 year old bonehead driver thrust through the windshield, DOA, is probably too easy to imagine. 

For that matter, wouldn’t it be nice if you could go to a car dealer, and have a choice not merely of the current model year or the prior year’s leftovers, or whatever used cars happen to be on the lot, but put in an order for any model year, any model.  The dealer could scan the Internet throughout the country for suitable models.  A revamping of the restoration industry could be a nice investment for someone like Warren Buffett, Bill Gates, or Paul Allen.  GM already has “Restoration  Parts”, a Taiwanese company makes brand new body shells for many 60s muscle cars.  A factory which could splice new bodies and recycle a host of unrestorable donor cars to be cannibailized, could essentially churn out modern-day versions of classic cars.  Sounds like a lot of work, but possibly a great operation if it could be done.   Dream on….