Welcome Back to 1995

It’s been 20 years.  What was life like – for me? (as if you care) – back then?

Household.  This was an efficiency at River Place, Rosslyn, Virginia, across Key Bridge from Georgetown, DC.  Since my brother was working next door at a Dilbertesque defense contractor, he was living with me at the time – about the only time since since college that I had a roommate.  A few years later he got married and moved out.

I’ve mentioned Rosslyn in a previous blog, so it doesn’t need much in the way of ad nauseam Turtledove repetition, but suffice to say that, with a Metro stop and walking distance to DC, plus Route 50, I-66, Route 29, and the GW Parkway, it’s hard to find a more convenient place to live in Northern Virginia.

Job.  I was working for Jerry, a sole practitioner who had moved to Virginia from California.  I had sworn into the Maryland bar in December 1993, passed the February 1994 Virginia bar and swore in down in Richmond in June 1994, but spent most of 1994 unemployed.  By December 1994 Jerry hired me back part-time.  By June 1995 I was back to full-time again.  The “firm” was just the two of us, so it gave me a lot of experience at a local level.  I zipped down to Richmond a few times to file appeals on concealed weapon permit cases.  Mostly I was handling traffic, criminal, and uncontested divorces in Arlington, Alexandria, Fairfax and Prince William.  Although I was also licensed in Maryland, Jerry wasn’t, so he was reluctant to have me screw up there without the benefit of his supervision.  Fortunately I handled a few cases there without a problem.  If there was a hopeless case I could cut my teeth on, Jerry sent me there to get experience (e.g. kept Pablo out of jail despite a JDR judge who hated his guts).  Plus we’d go to the range or the gun stores – fairly often.  It wasn’t great in terms of pay, but it was very satisfying.

I also started working part-time at Trak Auto, plus taking automotive classes at NOVA Alexandria.  I learned enough in those classes to be able to pass a few ASE exams: engine repair, automatic transmissions, and manual transmissions. 

Two Weddings, A Beginning, and no Funeral.  In May, my friend Jim married his first wife Elizabeth, in Princeton, New Jersey.  I attended that wedding but left the reception fairly soon.  The very next weekend my sister married her first husband Kyle in Gaithersburg, Maryland.   In October, my friend Phil first met his ex-wife Julie at a bar in Arlington.  As for myself, I wasn’t even dating anyone – any dates were one-and-done – and my next GF wouldn’t arrive on the scene until October 1999.

Performance Upgrade.   In June 1995, after searching for a year and a half, I finally got the car I wanted as my daily driver: a 1992 Pontiac Firebird Formula “350”, one of the rare models with the 5.7L V8, the top engine available.  This was purchased used from a couple in Maryland, it was blue-green metallic with black interior, and no options except the potent V8.  The original owner had given it the SLP package, an impressive 50 HP upgrade installed by Koons Pontiac at Tysons Corner.  It wasn’t black, but it was very fast: almost 300 HP, a substantial difference from the 200 HP in the 1992 base Firebird I had been driving up till then, and which I sold to Jerry immediately. 

In fall of that year, my friend Phil and I took a trip up to Detroit in an attempt - unsuccessful - to purchase a 1968 Pontiac Firebird 400.  This was white with an ivy green interior and automatic.  It had been in California for most of its life, so it had no rust.  But it wouldn't start, and we couldn't get a tow truck to bring it back, so we had to cancel the purchase and drive back in a rental car.  Too bad.

Music.  I saw Hawkwind at Jaxx, Grateful Dead at RFK (one of the last shows with Jerry Garcia), White Zombie (twice), once with Kyuss, and Ozzy Osbourne.  I had my Gibson SG ’62 reissue, my Gibson Explorer ’76 reissue, a Fender Stratocaster (62 Vintage Reissue), and my Marshall 2554 Jubilee Edition 1x12” combo, 25/50 watts. 

The outside world.  Bill Clinton was President – he’d trounce Bob Dole in 1996.  The Internet was just getting cranked up; most of us still used America Online (AOL: “You’ve got mail!”) or Prodigy.  Cell phones were nowhere near as ubiquitous as they are now, and we still kept land lines as a matter of course.  The top films were “Twelve Monkeys”, “Toy Story” (the first one), “Braveheart”, “The Usual Suspects” (one of Kevin Spacey’s first films), and “Batman Forever”, Val Kilmer’s only shot (Riddler & Two-Face were the villains).  Kilmer also managed to do “Heat” in this same year, a seriously underrated film which puts Al Pacino and Robert Deniro against each other.  

Shakespeare vs. Moliere

I just finished watching the 1968 film version of “A Midsummer Night’s Dream”, one of Shakespeare’s most popular plays (of the 38 he wrote during his lifetime).  This one features the Master Control Program, Sark (David Warner) as Lysander, Helen Mirren as Hermia, Judi Dench as Titania, Old Bilbo (Ian Holm) as Puck, and Lady Olenna, the Queen of Thorns, Diana Rigg, as Helena.   An excellent play, but you really have to pay attention because, as with all of Shakespeare’s stuff, the English is somewhat dated and difficult to follow.

Shakespeare.  Practically every US/UK student has to endure his plays through high school.   The man himself lived in England from 1564 to 1618.   His stories remain hugely popular and very often adapted to modern stories with contemporary dialogue.  [See The Onion: “Unconventional Director Sets Shakespeare Play in Time, Place, Author Intended.” http://www.theonion.com/article/unconventional-director-sets-shakespeare-play-in-t-2214] Actors often wind up in high demand for Star Trek. 

As mentioned, the English is clever but difficult to follow.  In high school the books tended to alternate pages from actual dialogue to glossaries.  Ages ago we had a friend Mariano, from Costa Rica, whose English was very good, but even he was lost trying to follow Hamlet (the Mel Gibson version).

I’ll review some of the most popular, but obviously not all of them.

A Midsummer Night’s Dream.  Whimsical fancy.  A bunch of layabouts do a play, led by Bottom, who winds up with a donkey’s head.  Meanwhile Puck acts as Cupid and messes things up for a pair of couples, Lysander, Demetrios, Hermia, and Helena.  Fortunately everything gets worked out in the end, but not before some confusion passing for comedy.

Much Ado About Nothing.  This isn’t nearly as popular in itself, but serves to inspire dozens of contemporary “love at first hate” stories:  Pride & Prejudice/Bridget Jones’ Diary, Gone with the Wind, and Star Wars:  any story in which the lead male and female characters start off hating each other but eventually fall in love.  Benedick and Beatrice are the original bickering couple matching wits and insults.  “Who you calling scruffy?”

Romeo & Juliet.   “Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo?” A more mundane tragedy we all know.   Star-crossed lovers, forbidden to marry by their respective feuding families, wind up dead.  Hopefully this stirs the Montagues and Capulets to actually bury the hatchet, but with no sequel, how will we ever know?

Othello.  “The wine she drinks is made out of grapes”, spoketh Iago, easily the nastiest, but also tastiest villain of them all.  He’s jealous that Cassio wins a commission from Othello, the Big Dark Guy, so he puts it in Othello’s head that Mrs Othello, Desdemona, is having an affair with Cassio.  And it goes downhill from there.

MacBeth.  “Out, damn spot!”   The villain kills off Banquo, whose ghost comes back to haunt the overambitious Scottish king.  His wife, Lady MacBeth, is as deceitful and manipulative a woman e’er created in a story, and makes it worth enduring.   Very juicy.   [How about making Iago and Lady MacBeth a couple?  Indulge us.]

Hamlet.   “To Be Or Not To Be”.  Here’s where George R. R. Martin gets his penchant for killing off practically everyone.  Sorry to spoil the surprise, but by the end of the Danish tragedy, the only ones not dead are the ghosts.

Julius Caesar.  “Friends, Romans, countrymen, lend me your ears…” (Marc Anthony).  Since Brutus is the last to plunge a dagger into Caesar, he gets the famous line, “Et tu, Brute?” by the rapidly deceasing title character. 

Finally, Henry VI, Part II.  “The first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers.”  Spoken by Dick the Butcher, in a conversation with fellow murderer/conspirator Jack Cade.   Generally it’s been my experience that this quote is trotted out by non-lawyers to make themselves look witty, educated, etc. at the expense of lawyers.  Was it meant as an insult to lawyers? Or a backhanded compliment?  The most logical conclusion, given the context, is that it’s the latter: spoken by villains while planning their evil deeds and casually discussing “wouldn’t it be nice?”  Although Shakespeare was as knowledgeable as any of his peers that lawyers were as fallible and imperfect as anyone else, he didn’t seem to have any beef with lawyers as a profession as a matter of principle.

Moliere.  Jean-Baptiste Poquelin, lived from 1622-1673, so he came later than Shakespeare.  None of his plays seem to copy WS’ plots.  He was writing for French King Louis XIV.   Although he wrote 35 plays from 1645 to 1673, I read a mere fraction of them, and ONLY for French class when living in Paris from 1979-90.  [Marcel Pagnol was the only French author I liked enough to read his material voluntarily, though I should probably be more of a Camus fan than I am.  Anyhow.]  Ironically, Moliere is a bit easier to follow than Shakespeare as the French isn’t nearly as obtuse.  The three I’d comment on are as follows:

L’Avare (the Miser) (1668).  Basically about a Montgomery Burns/Ebenezer Scrooge grumpy old man obsessed with keeping his vast wealth. 

Le Bourgeois Gentilhomme (The Bourgeois Gentleman) (1670).   Kissing ass to King Louis XIV, Moliere mercilessly ridiculed a fictional merchant intent on buying nobility, as if such a thing could be crassly purchased with bags of gold. 

Les Femmes Savants (The Learned Women) (1672).  Here he makes fun of women pretending to be well-educated and intellectuals, when we all know they’re only good for “Kinder, Kuche, Kirche” (children, cooking, church) as the Germans might put it. 

Perhaps it’s because the world is more Anglo-centric than Franco-centric, but Shakespeare’s stories have far more application and popularity outside the high school English classroom than Moliere does outside the French class.   The other issue, and probably more pertinent, is that Shakespeare was writing for the general public, whereas Moliere only had to please the King, whose interests and preferences would have been considerably more limited than the population of London.  Having said that, the latter’s stories don’t seem to have resulted in any mainstream films and remain in the realm of plays, even to this day, i.e. I’m still waiting for the Onion article, “Unconventional Director Sets Moliere Play in Time, Place Author Intended.”

Old Town Alexandria

I had to drop off documents at a lawyer’s office, and guess what – that meant driving through Old Town Alexandria, Virginia.  [I’ve been to Egypt, but not their Alexandria.  Sorry.]

It’s old.  It’s fancy.  It’s nice.  It’s cool.

King Street.  This is Route 7, starting somewhere near Winchester, winding its way through Leesburg, Sterling, Tyson’s Corner, Falls Church, and then finally falling into the Potomac River.  It runs northwest to southeast.

Washington Street.  The George Washington Parkway passes by Reagan National Airport and becomes Washington Street as it goes north-south through Alexandria, bisecting King Street.   There’s a cool Confederate statue at the intersection with Prince Street.

Courthouse.  The Circuit Court of Alexandria is a 4 story building on King Street.  It’s nice and fancy without being too old.  I like going to court here, but lately I’ve been filing my uncontested divorces in Fairfax.

Federal Courthouse.   This is over on Duke Street.  It’s a 10 story palace of justice.  Amazing.  Generally, though, although I’m admitted to this court (US District Court for the Eastern District of Virginia, Alexandria Division) I rarely have occasion to practice here.

115 S. Union Street.   I’m more apt to be down here:  the Trustee’s Office, for bankruptcy cases. It’s just a block from the river.  Very nice.

Webelos.  Back in the late 70s, when we were living in the US, our Cub Scout group took a tour of Old Town Alexandria.  The tour began down near the town hall.  I can’t remember much more than that.  We took a similar tour of Annapolis, Maryland.

Old Town Armory.   Fond memories of this gun boutique on King Street.  I got my first Beretta there, an AR15, and my current Mauser Kar98K.  Unfortunately, it’s not there anymore. 

Town Hall.   A big, fancy, modern brick building, where you go if you have City of Alexandria business.  Note: some “Alexandria” addresses (e.g. outside the Beltway) are actually in Fairfax County.

Masonic Thing.  Up on a big hill, right on King Street, is the George Washington Masonic Memorial.  This is NOT a Masonic Temple and no temple activities are conducted here.  It’s simply a large and an elaborate memorial to GW AS a Mason, which he was.  They give free tours which are highly informative and highly recommended.  You get to visit the top of the thing and look down around; the view is spectacular.  Don’t miss it.  

The Rolling Stones

Yes, the oldest rock band in the world, still in business for over 50 years.

Members.

Mick Jagger (lead vocals).  The flamboyant, extroverted, sometimes androgynous lead singer, co-writer with Richards of most their material.  He’s fairly intelligent, articulate and has a good voice.  I’ve said before, the epitome of cool is not being an arrogant asshole when you have every right to be, and certainly this applies to Mick Jagger (less so to Keith, but not by much).  He knows how to laugh at himself.  Sadly, his acting career was not up to snuff: “Ned Kelly”, “Performance” and “Freejack” are worth checking out once and then never again.

Keith Richards (lead guitar, vocals).  Jack Sparrow: “Have you found the fountain of youth?” Richards, smiling and pointing to his wrinkled face: “Does it look like I’ve found the fountain of youth?”  Never particularly handsome even when young, he’s even less so now.  He’s got R&B blues guitar down solid, these days favoring Fender Telecasters artificially aged.  He used to play Gibson Firebirds, and was ahead of the curve in adopting Gibson Les Pauls, including at least one Les Paul Custom.   His sound is just a little dirty.

Charlie Watts (drums).  Solid behind the drum kit and always looking serious.  He only played Gretsch drums but refused to endorse them.  [RIP 8/24/21]

Bill Wyman (bass).   Now retired.  For awhile he seemed to point the neck up almost vertical.  Also infamous for being the most female-hungry of the band.

Brian Jones (guitar).  The original second guitarist, favoring oddball guitars like the Vox and the nonreverse Firebird.  Famously died “facedown” in the pool in July 1969; also famous for wearing the black Allgemeine SS uniform, supposedly as a joke or stunt.

Mick Taylor (guitar).   Replaced Jones in time for the Hyde Park concert in July 1969 (King Crimson opened).  His sunburst Les Paul was actually purchased from Richards a few years before he joined the band.  He gets credit for being the guitarist for the Stones’ peak years in the late 60s and early 70s.

Ron Wood (guitar).  He took over from Taylor in the mid-70s and has been with them ever since – longer than Jones and Taylor combined.  I actually met him in person back at Marymount, Paris, when his kid was attending the same school I went to – though his kid was much younger than me.  He signed my Rolling Stones lips logo patch.

Now I have all 24 of the Stones’ US studio albums.  Reviewing each one would be a nuisance.  Like the Beatles, the early albums bifurcate between US and UK versions, with Their Satanic Majesties Request being the convergence album, like Sgt. Pepper for the Beatles.

Phase I:  Brian Jones.   Starting out practically all covers, unlike the Beatles.  They do a good job of the covers, though.  None of the albums is consistently good.  See Hot Rocks.

Albums:   England’s Newest Hitmakers; 12x5; The Rolling Stones, Now!; Out of Our Heads; December’s Children (And Everybody’s); Aftermath; Between the Buttons; Their Satanic Majesties Request; Beggars Banquet

Phase II:  Mick Taylor.   You’ll notice that except for Beggars Banquet and Some Girls, this period covers the most well-known and esteemed albums.   Really this is supposed to be the Stones at their peak, but I much prefer Some Girls to Exile on Main Street. 

Albums:  Let It Bleed; Sticky Fingers; Exile on Main Street; Goats Head Soup; It’s Only Rock’n’Roll

Phase III: Ron Wood in the 70s.  Sharing esteem with the prior phase thanks to Some Girls, with Tattoo You rounding off this section (I’ll admit that cutoff is somewhat arbitrary on my part).  A huge dose of disco also gets added to the mix.  Unlike the Beatles, who were pioneers, the Stones often followed popular trends rather than establishing them.  I find this stuff fairly commercial.  Did I mention I like Some Girls?

Albums:  Black And Blue; Some Girls; Emotional Rescue; Tattoo You

Phase IV: Ron Wood to the present.   Actually this is the most solid and consistent work.  Most songs are standard rock and roll and not bad at all.  It’s like they settled into a rhythm of producing decent rock songs and not worrying about venturing outside their comfort zone.  I’ve yet to hear Stones fans talk highly of these albums (they all love Exile on Main Street) but if we classify the Stones as a rock band, these albums should get more credit than they do.  None are substandard or mediocre.  

Albums: Undercover; Dirty Work; Steel Wheels; Voodoo Lounge; Bridges to Babylon; A Bigger Bang.

Live.   By all means, get Get Your Ya-Yas Out, and I like Still Life (from the Tattoo You tour in 1981).  If there’s one area where the Stones get credit for beating the Beatles down cold, it’s as a live band.  Fortunately Mick has toned down his androgyny big time, but he’s still a swishy peacock. 

Movies.  "Gimme Shelter" features a NY show and the infamous Altamount concert (December 1969).  The Stones were not at Woodstock that summer because Mick Jagger was in Australia filming “Ned Kelly”. 
“Rolling Stones Rock’n’Roll Circus” is actually not bad.  In addition to Jethro Tull (“Song For Jeffrey”) with Tony Iommi, there’s the Who (“A Quick One”), Dirty Mac (Lennon, Clapton, Richards, Mitch Mitchell) (“Yer Blues”) and Taj Mahal.  The Stones’ set still has Brian Jones, Keith Richards plays a Les Paul Custom, and Beggars Banquet is the featured album, but the set also features “Jumpin’ Jack Flash”, “You Can’t Always Get What You Want”, and “Sympathy For The Devil.”  Worth watching, even if the circus element is immensely corny.

Hot Rocks (1964-71).  Since the Stones albums are all fairly hit or miss, this compilation does an incredible job of assembling their best hits from their peak era.  Plus it adds some songs which were singles and not on any studio album.  Really you could stick with this (and Ya-Yas) and have the essential Stones.  If you absolutely HAVE to, get Exile, and be prepared to wonder what the fuss is all about. 

Vs. the Beatles.  The two bands had a major rivalry.  My preference is, and has always been, for the Beatles.  Their material, song by song, album by album, is consistently good: there are very few awful Beatles songs and no bad albums.  They stopped doing covers very early on.  Musically and artistically they’re on a completely different level than the Stones.  As noted above, it’s only live that the Stones top the Beatles.  

One more thing.  It's tempting, especially for Stones fans who might be fed up with the incessant unfavorable comparisons to the Beatles - and for Mick, Keith, Charlie, etc. themselves - to consider the Stones the better rock band.  I might be inclined to agree if only due to the constant touring.  HOWEVER, there's an 800 lb gorilla in this argument called "Helter Skelter".  Now having heard all the Stones' studio albums from England's Newest Hitmakers to A Bigger Bang, their extra tracks, and their most famous live material (Ya-Yas and Altamont, among many others), I can say they have no song even remotely as bad-ass and heavy as "Helter Skelter".  It's off the chart.  It's downright METAL.  Thank you, Paul McCartney, for "Yesterday", "Blackbird", and "Hey Jude", but you also knocked it out of the ballpark with "Helter Skelter".  AMEN.

Rudds: Phil vs. Paul

I get these two mixed up.  They’re not even related to each other.

Phil Rudd.  Born in Melbourne, Australia in May 1954.  Joined AC/DC as drummer in 1974.  Seen driving a Porsche 928 in “Let There Be Rock”.   He was fired after Flick of the Switch in 1983, but came back in late 1993 in time for Ballbreaker.  He’s had to depart again due to his criminal issues in New Zealand, where he lives. 

His new solo album, Head Job, recently came out.  Not surprisingly, it sounds a bit like AC/DC, but the singer bears more in common with Lemmy (Motorhead) than Bon Scott or Brian Johnson.  It’s quality, if not particularly original or remarkable.  Depending on his legal situation, he may or may not get the chance to tour it.

During his departure from AC/DC he lived in New Zealand and kept a low profile, not professionally involved with any band.  Head Job features guitarist Geoffrey Martin and bassist/singer Allan Badger.

Paul Rudd.  Born in Passaic, New Jersey, in January 1969 – about the same age I am.  He grew up in Kansas.  His first major film role was “Clueless” (w/Alicia Silverstone) and he had a bit part on “Friends” as Phoebe’s boyfriend.  His role as Brian Fontana on “Anchorman” essentially cemented him as a mainstream actor.  Sex Panther!  “60% of the time it works every time!”   “I Love You, Man”, though, with Jason Segal, is probably my favorite role of his.