These are two lawyer-themed shows. “Harvey Birdman, Attorney At Law” is on Adult Swim, an adult-oriented part of Cartoon Network which only airs at night. Denny Crane is the character played by William Shatner, best known as Captain Kirk from “Star Trek”, on the TV show “Boston Legal”. [I originally posted this on 7/30/10 and am updating it now having finished watching the fifth and final season of "Boston Legal".]
Harvey Birdman is an animated show which takes aim at various cartoon characters, of the Hanna-Barbera variety (no sign of Warner Brothers or Disney characters). With his signature bravado, lawyer Birdman announces that “I’ll take the case!” He’s voiced by Gary Cole, better known as Bill Lumbergh from “Office Space” (“that would be great, um-kay?”). It’s gone on for 3 seasons and all three are now available on DVD.
In law school, they taught us to “spot the issues”, and frequently our exams would consist of a rambling fact pattern and the question was, “identify the causes of action illustrated and explain how strong they are.” Likewise, HB seems to do just that. Here are some examples:
In his first case, HB represents Dr. Quest in his custody dispute with Race Bannon over Johnny Quest. Later, HB defends Shaggy (of Scooby Doo) on unspecified drug charges, Secret Squirrel (who is accused of exposing himself when he opens his trench coat), and Fred Flintstone (accused of being a mobster). It’s all very irreverent, but you can see how they show legal issues erupting in otherwise non-legal contexts.
Some of the colorful characters in the HB world: his legal nemesis Vulturo, a be-feathered villain who speaks with an affected British accent (reminds me of Christopher Hitchens); Reducto, the very short alien who threatens to reduce his adversaries to “fun-size”; HB’s wife Gigi, who seems to sleep with everyone EXCEPT him; Mentok the Mind-Taker, who frequently acts as the judge; Peanut, his assistant who does very little work; his bird mascot, Avenger; X The Eliminator, a Dormammu-looking villain whose attempt to assassinate Birdman or steal his crest (the source of his powers) appear to be a lame effort at attention and approval; Peter Potomus, who works in the building and periodically peeks in the office to ask Birdman, “did you get that thing I sent you?”. It’s all very irreverent but mixes H-B cartoon nostalgia with a cursory lesson in jurisprudence 101.
Sebben & Sebben. This is supposed to be a law firm, but Phil Ken Sebben never takes any cases or discusses them with Harvey. His corporate propaganda film makes S&S look like a regular company which has a lawyer on staff (HB) who handles lawsuits. This violates bar rules of every jurisdiction except D.C., and it’s apparent the show does not take place in D.C. Am I overanalyzing this? You bet. It’s what we lawyers do best.
Birdgirl. The daughter, Judy, of Phil Ken Sebben. She has the hots for Birdman (not Peanut) and tries to assist him in her guise as Birdgirl. As practically all cartoon women, she is excellently proportioned, which does not escape the notice of her father, who makes incestuous advances at her oblivious to her true identity; in fact, he appears oblivious to practically everything, but is still arrogant and certain of everything. She’s saved from marrying him by an obscure relative who captures PKB’s heart at the wedding.
In fact, in practically all DC Comics, Marvel Comics, and the animated versions thereof, female superheroes and supervillains share the exact same body type: hourglass figure, killer legs, C cup bust (ample but not ridiculous), and a full head of hair. Whether it’s Wonder Woman, Hawkgirl, Harlequin, Batgirl, Supergirl, She-Hulk, Spider-Woman, Catwoman, Poison Ivy, etc. they all have the same figure. I’m not complaining: for some reason Hollywood’s standard for female beauty to devolved to Sarah Jessica Parker, i.e. extremely skinny with no bust.
Boston Legal. As with “L.A. Law”, “Boston Legal” puts what would be considered a small firm into office space typically occupied by a huge firm; in Crane, Poole, & Schmidt there seem to be maximum 20 lawyers, with cast members changing from season to season. There are five seasons in total, and the cases get stranger as the show goes on.
Supposedly, the main character is Denny Crane (Shatner), a pompous attorney so enthralled with his own mystique and reputation that he constantly repeats his own name. But he’s past his prime and he knows it – he’s even coming down with Alzheimer’s, which he refers to as “Mad Cow disease”. The writers seem to pour all the worst Tea Party, GOP, and Red State inanities into Crane, yet still manage to make him barely likeable. “You’re a bigoted, arrogant, selfish, pompous old fart...but we love you anyway!”
“Poole” is played by Larry Miller. He has a nervous breakdown and has to be committed, and retired indefinitely. Unlike Denny, his illness is caused by the stress of being in litigation for so long; the mental toll is more than he can handle.
His #2, so to speak, is Alan Shore (James Spader). As a practical matter, Shore turns out to be the main lawyer on the show as he handles most of the toughest cases; Crane occasionally comes in on some cases but the plot seems to focus more on his idiosyncrasies and personality conflicts with Shirley Schmidt than on any courtroom activities of his.
Shore manages to be obnoxiously cynical and annoyingly moral at the same time. Unlike Crane, Shore seems to be the mouthpiece for the writers’ own political views. I’ve noticed this in other contexts: newspaper articles (not editorials) and TV news shows. The Blue State view is presented in a neutral or mildly favorable tone, whereas the Red State view (e.g. NRA) is described as [proponent] “claims” or “alleges”, the same way you might say, that crazy man on the street “claims the world is going to end” or “Lyndon LaRouche claims the Queen of England is a Communist drug dealer”. And the Blue State view always, always, ALWAYS gets the last word. What you’re left with is a nominal pretense of an intelligent debate on the issues but in reality it’s heavily slanted in favor of what they consider the “winning side” (theirs).
Anyhow, Shore tends to argue cases in a way that suggests that he believes his client’s position is not merely legally superior, but also morally superior. This is the same guy who frequently resorts to blackmail and other unsavory methods to secure favorable settlements outside the courtroom, but even his courtroom antics border on contempt. It’s like he deliberately flirts with, or dances around, the grey areas to push the envelope (that familiar compliment we hear: if you weren’t in trouble we’d think you’re not trying). On the other hand, the lesser lights at the firm run afoul of Lewiston and the Bar, but they stumble into it unwittingly; Shore is the Harold Lloyd of legal ethics.
Towards the end of many episodes, Crane and Shore puff away on cigars on their firm’s balcony, idly chewing the fat about the day’s trials or the larger issues at stake – or their lives. The writers do seem to realize that “a stopped clock is right twice a day”, so Crane is not 100% completely full of shit. Often times he simply comes off as a counterpoint to Shore to keep the latter on his toes or just to give (as noted before) the nominal appearance of objectivity and balance.
Initially they had Alan Shore win every case no matter how implausibly, ridiculously or unethically. It reached the point where Lewiston (Rene Auberjonois, best known as “Odo” from Star Trek/Deep Space Nine, but here he’s revisiting his “Clayton” character on the show “Benson”) would tell him, “officially, I cannot sanction [highly effective yet highly unethical practice]” while “nudge nudge wink wink”ing him to subtly encourage him to get his hands dirty. Lately I’ve seen him lose cases, and sometimes even take positions I agree with.
There is also Shirley Schmidt (Candice Bergen), who supposedly was Crane’s lover in a past life (!) but now simply rebuffs his clumsy passes by repeating his name to him. And she rebuffs Alan’s suave but equally unwanted passes with appropriately snide remarks.
I find the rest of the characters vary in quality and likeability. Examples: Marine Boy (Mark Valley), English Tart (Rhona Mitra), Stuck Up Blond (Monica Potter), Uncle Ruckus (Gary Anthony Williams). By the end we have Jerry "Hands" Espenson (Christian Clemenson) who has Asperger's syndrome, so he can't function without a fake cigarette which turns him into a bigger asshole than Denny Crane, and Carl Sack (John Larroquette), a visiting partner from New York who winds up with Shirley, much to Denny's jealousy. Opposing counsel come and go, but Melvin Palmer seems to be the one who sticks around most often - much to Alan's immense annoyance.
Having bitched all that, the arguments presented in court are legally valid and legitimate, on both sides, no matter how slanted they are presented. It’s legally accurate though politically charged. “Harvey Birdman” is too humor-oriented and irreverent to have any pretense of presenting coherent political or social arguments, but even its cartoonish (!) depiction of the law is still illustrative and informative, in a limited way.
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