Last weekend I went to the Maryland Renaissance Festival for what must have been the third time. As always, I had a good time, especially since the weather was spectacular and the crowds were cooperative – not excessive, and entertaining in their own, sometimes unintentional, manner.
Renaissance. This would merit its own blog entry, but I’ll keep it brief. This is essentially a European thing. Literally “rebirth”, it marks a major change in European history, when the Catholic Church lost its iron grip on the continent, allowing science and reason became predominant. It was political writers of this era, particularly John Locke, who inspired the Founding Fathers to reject the divine right of King George III to rule the colonies and rebel against English rule and start up a brand new republic which we know of today as the United States
There are a few “free” events: sword swallowers, jugglers, and acrobats, even short parodies of Shakespeare plays; by now I’d imagine his material is public domain. The most famous exhibition is the joust, which I saw a few years ago: a pair of fully armored knights on horseback charging at each other in lanes facing each other, attempting to knock each other off their horses with huge lances (presumably this variety is not fatal).
But 80% of the “spectacles” are vendors selling a variety of Renaissance themed items. The huge turkey legs – which we commonly imagine Henry VIII gnawing upon – are here, and they sell mead, which seems to taste like a cross between beer and cider. Other vendors sell clothing, jewelry, glass, honey, hats, walking sticks, magic wands (a la Harry Potter), swords (wooden mock swords and real steel ones), armor, armored lingerie (!!!), woodprints and maps, even furniture. In fact, the event might be more accurately described as a Renaissance Mall, since the “we’ll sell you stuff” element is about 90% of the festival and only 10% is actually free (net of the admission fee for the fair itself, of course). A few years ago I rode on an elephant, which has a huge platform on top and wallows around a small circle slowly; it’s not very comfortable as you sit with your legs spread wide apart. It was interesting enough for one shot, but not worth doing more than once – especially since it’s not free and has a long line anyway.
Costumes. About 50% of the festival attendees – leaving aside the park employees themselves – seem to come in costume. Jack Sparrow, a popular character, was absent this year, as was Henry VIII. Kilts are very popular – “yes, I’m Braveheart!” Some doofuses wore top hats to complement costumes which were otherwise mostly correct; they seem to be less concerned with being authentic and more concerned with looking cool. I see very few people dressed as peasants; the affair is 95% “chiefs” (kings, queens, princes, nobles) and 5% of the 99% (Mitt Romney was absent). Vikings, Picts, and Ravens fans are also common. I don’t see many “Crusaders”, and have never seen a Saracen. If you’re of Japanese descent, perhaps a samurai or geisha would be the appropriate costume. Women seem to love dressing up as much as men do, particularly to wear provocative bodices pushing their boobs up and almost out. Buxom wenches, I presume. A meat market? The Society for Consenting Adults? Overall, the Food Court Druid brigade is well represented at the fair. And fortunately the Black Plague (as mentioned earlier), while a completely period-appropriate ingredient, is absent from the Fair. Best to focus the positive, I would say.
Opie & Anthony. Years ago, when they were still on regular non-satellite radio, this pair described their visit to the NY area fair (perhaps the one in Tuxedo). Opie talked about being in line for mead or a turkey leg, and the vendor – dressed in costume – broke character and recognized him. “Mead for m’lord or lady, as you wish – HEY, OPIE, MAN! I love your show!”
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