"Super" Heroes

Recently I caught Woody Harrelson’s “superhero” film, “Defendor”.  Add that to the other three films featuring a “superhero” who has NO super powers.

First:  Batman and Iron Man.  Unlike Superman, Spiderman, Wonder Woman, the Fantastic 4, the Avengers, etc., these two have no intrinsic super powers.  Really, their “super powers” are “so f**king rich they can buy Batmobiles and flying armor”.  What’s funny is that we’ve yet to see a real billionaire, like Bill Gates or Warren Buffett, do anything like this.  Jeff Bezos, where is your Bezomobile?  Anyhow.  So what does a would-be superhero without any huge amount of money – a regular guy – do?

Defendor (2009).  Woody Harrelson becomes Defendor (spelled with an “o”).  He puts on a black costume with a duct taped D and paints a black mask over his face – not even a cloth mask he can take off.  Kat Dennings, the hotter of the Two Broke Girls, plays a hooker who befriends him.   Defendor is a bit “not there” and isn’t particularly good at fighting.  He believes “Captain Industry” is the bad guy who needs to be taken down.  There is a corrupt cop, Dooney (Elias Koteas), and his sometime boss (Michael Kelly, who we recognize from “House of Cards”) helps him out.  Overall I found it mostly frustrating and “when will this be over”?  Dennings is eye candy but Harrelson getting his ass kicked in Toronto doesn’t really make for a compelling story.

Watch it once and then go back to a regular Marvel or DC superhero movie.

Super (2010).  Rainn Wilson becomes the Crimson Bolt.  He’s trying to save his wife (Liv Tyler) from the clutches of an evil drug dealer (Kevin Bacon – in another film) while assisted by Libby (Ellen Page) who becomes his sidekick.  He’s inspired by Holy Avenger (Nathan Fillion).   He’s remarkably effective notwithstanding his complete lack of superpowers or even special skills. 

Watch it once and then go back to a regular Marvel or DC superhero movie.

Kick-Ass (2010).  I reviewed these two earlier (1/24/14) so I'll keep the reviews brief.  Refer back to the prior blog post for more detail on these.

Aaron Taylor-Johnson becomes Kick-Ass.  And does so again in the sequel, Kick-Ass 2 (2013).  In the first film he’s up against legitimate bad guy Mafia boss Frank D’Amico (Mark Strong), and allied with Big Daddy (Nicolas Cage), a former cop turned Batman without much in the way of actual super powers or gadgets.  Big Daddy has been training his daughter as his sidekick, Hit Girl (Chloe Grace-Moretz).   Things get very nasty and violent.

There’s an equally nasty and violent sequel, Kick-Ass 2, in which D’Amico’s son (Christopher Mintz-Plasse) becomes the Motherf**ker to avenge his father.  This was the film which got publicity when Jim Carrey, who plays Colonel Stars & Stripes, heavily bad-mouthed the film after it came out.  Hit Girl retired to focus on a normal social life at school, leaving KA to recruit another team of nobodies to help him.  For his part, Motherf**ker recruits his own team, including the remarkably impressive Mother Russia.  

Like the first one, it has a heavy dose of violence.  I’d say it’s rare sequel which equals or exceeds the quality of the original.  I have NOT read the source material comic books, so I can’t comment on how faithful the movies are to the books, nor on their relative merit or lack thereof.

Unlike the other two, I got these two on DVD, and as you might imagine, I can recommend them, IF you can tolerate a “Scarface” level of violence.   

Kick Asses

As promised, here is part two of the Red-Ass-Burgundy Trilogy.  These movies are based on graphic novels which I have NOT read, so my reviews solely concern the films themselves. 

Kick Ass.   I’d balked at this film for some time because I thought it was just about some clown dressed up in costume and a little girl dressed up in costume.   Which it is.  But it is so much more than that.  In fact, it kicks ass.

            Dave Lizewski (Aaron Taylor-Johnson) is a nerdy, bullied teen at a high school in New York.  Fed up with being pushed around, he orders a superhero costume off the Internet and ventures off as Kick-Ass – though without any super powers or even the slightest fighting ability.  Sure enough, he’s the one whose ass is kicked.  After being beaten up by street thugs, he’s hit by a car, and the resulting surgery leaves him with so much metal inside he’s a de facto Wolverine, without the adamantium claws or regeneration – or offensive capabilities:  more like an improved ability to absorb the inevitable punishment he endures because he still can’t fight to save his life.

            Meanwhile, big time crime lord Frank D’Amico (Mark Strong) finds his operations and minions being hammered by a mysterious caped crusader his hapless minions describe as “Bat Man”, but who turns out to be Big Daddy, aka Damon MacCready (Nicolas Cage).  Damon went to prison for a few years, framed by D’Amico and now intent on revenge.  Like Batman, he lacks super powers, per se, and is simply well-versed in martial arts, gadgets, and firearms skills.  His home is like a private arsenal, though falls well short of Bruce Wayne’s elaborate Bat Cave.

Instead of “Robin”, Big Daddy has a daughter, Mindy (Chloe Grace Moretz), who is as martially inclined and skilled as he is: Hit Girl, despite being all of …11?  Hit Girl rescues Kick-Ass and a bond is formed. Oh, Dave also has a bunch of nerdy friends, he tries to keep his identity a secret – even from them – and has a GF, Katie (Lyndsy Fonseca) who likes him because she thinks he’s gay.  Wait for the other shoe to drop….

            Meanwhile, D’Amico’s son Chris (Christopher Mintz-Plasse, aka “McLovin” from “Superbad”) wants to impress his father, so he takes the persona of Red Mist, to betray Kick Ass by gaining his trust and forming a team – with the goal to lure Kick-Ass into an ambush.   That’s the plan, at least.  But nothing goes according to anyone’s plan.

            From there, things start getting VERY violent.   There is blood, explosions, deaths, a painful firey death, with a definite body count – most of it caused by Hit Girl herself, after Big Daddy the most dangerous person in the film.  As you can imagine, there is a final confrontation between Frank, Kick-Ass, and Hit Girl.   Although you can sense where the film will eventually go, the route it takes is not obvious and is definitely entertaining, if extremely violent.

Kick Ass 2.  Naturally there is a sequel.   Mindy tries to retire as Hit Girl and be a normal teenager (i.e. fit in with the popular girls at school), leaving Kick Ass to find another companion: amateur crime fighting team Justice Forever, led by Captain Stars & Stripes (Jim Carrey – as unrecognizable as in “The Mask”), a reformed mob hitman turned right wing maniac.  The team also includes Night Bitch (Lindy Booth), Dr Gravity, and Battle Guy (Dave’s friend Marty), more would-be superheroes without super powers or even anything remotely resembling fighting skills, or competence with or possession of firearms.  Katie dumps Dave, believing that he’s cheating on her with Mindy – who is still only about 13.  Although Dave is pretty buff, he’s still barely learning how to defend himself and is well below Hit Girl’s standards, so in addition to the age difference, Mindy probably wouldn’t be interested in a guy she still has to constantly rescue from his own incompetence.

            Meanwhle, Chris D’Amico, determined to avenge his father, renames himself Motherf**ker, and gets his personal assistant Javier (John Leguizamo) to recruit a super villain team, of which the most notable is Mother Russia (Olga Kurkulina) – a supremely bad-ass bitch.  This team dispatches Capt Stars, but also kills several cops (Mother Russia on her own, no less!), enraging the city against all superheroes, which lands Dave’s father in jail when he comes forward claiming to be Kick-Ass to cover for Dave.  

Naturally there is yet another showdown between Kick-Ass & Hit Girl vs. Motherf**ker and his host of baddies.  Hell, there’s even a shark in here.   Did I mention Ser Jorah Mormont (Iain Glen) is here as Chris’ Uncle Ralph?  While the ultimate outcome is fairly easy to predict, HOW that outcome is reached is still far from obvious and well worth watching.   In other words, this film also kicks ass.  Still not safe for children, though.