The Formula

The Bird. I've had the car now for almost 11 years. People tell me to get rid of it, to get something newer. To them, it's just an old, outdated car. To me, it's far more than that.

Transportation. For most people, a car is just a machine, a means of getting from point A to point B. It has as much charm, beauty, or soul as a blender, a refridgerator, or a toaster. They don't care how fast it goes, how it looks, how it handles - just so long as it works reliably and cheaply. Replace their Honda Civic with a Toyota Corolla or Nissan Sentra and they won't blink, much less complain - same with a Honda Accord vs. Toyota Camry vs. Nissan Stanza. It's just a car. So what? When it gets old you replace it with something new - whatever dealer is giving the best rate, or whoever Consumer Reports rates highest that year.

For me it's something else, something more. I bought this car - 1992 Pontiac Firebird Formula "350" - because I wanted this particular car. Last year of the 3rd generation (1982-92), a Formula vs. a Trans Am (much less a Z/28); and with the 5.7L (350) V8, not the anemic 5.0L (305) V8 most of these cars came with. The 350 is not just 45 (or .7L) more, not just a bigger engine - it's a much better engine, born in 1967 when the horsepower wars were in full swing. The 350 responds well to modification (unlike the 305) and this car is definitely modified: headers, 3" exhaust, aftermarket intake manifold and runners, chip, 3" driveshaft and 3.73 gears – among many other changes. And this engine certainly gets the job done, even with 200,000 miles on it.

Power and Torque. You step on the gas, and the car moves, NOW. No hesitation, no delay, no reluctance. Economy cars react like "hey, what's the big hurry? We'll get there...eventually." This car reacts, "SIR YES SIR!" on the double. Even when merging on the highway, or passing, the engine barely breaks up a sweat. It's up to 90 without even noticing. Again, this is even with 200k on the odometer. Some economy cars have some off-the-line oomph, but they run out of breath quickly. In this case the car just keeps pulling through the RPM band. The mid-range torque is incredible.

Style. This changes over the years. Some cars are going to look dated after 10-20 years - some after 5 years. But some cars have a unique style which transcends years. The classic VW Beetle. The 1968-70 Dodge Charger ("Dukes of Hazzard" body style). The '70-81 Trans Am. I think the Pontiac designers got the angles, style and curves dead on in 1982. They even beat the Camaro, which has a rounded nose and rear, not nearly as sharp and well-proportioned as the Firebird. The problem with economy and regular cars (as opposed to sporty cars) is that they LOOK like standard cars. You go out into the parking lot in the mall to find your Accord or Camry, and you’re looking for one car among many, that looks like all the others. Nothing special or different. Nothing to get excited about. These cars lack passion, soul, or character. Even the new GTO (2004-06) suffers the same fate: although it has a 400 HP 6.0L V8, its looks come nowhere close to matching its performance. This is not a problem the Firebird ever had. To the contrary, the Firebird looked fast even when it had a pathetically slow 4 or 6 cylinder engine under the hood. Of course, with a strong engine, the package works even better.

 Camaro vs. Firebird vs. Mustang. The Ford Mustang came out first, in April 1964 (as a 1965 model year). GM had nothing comparable (certainly the Corvair didn’t qualify) so they pushed out two of their own cars, two-door four-seater sporty cars, front-engine rear wheel drive. The Chevrolet Camaro came out in September 1966 (as a 1967 model year); the Pontiac Firebird was late, February 1967 (also 1967 model year). Each rapidly eclipsed the Mustang in performance, if not in sales. Up until 1982, Firebirds had Pontiac V8s and Camaros had Chevrolet V8s – from 1982 onward, both cars were only available with Chevrolet V8s, not much of a difference for the Camaro crowd, but a huge letdown for the Pontiac nuts.

 The Firebird dominated both the Camaro and the Mustang. In 1969 the Trans Am was introduced, which became the top performance model, available with the largest engine Pontiac made, the 455. The Camaro was not available with Chevy’s 454, and the top model, the Z/28, wasn’t even offered in 1975-76. And as for the Mustang: from 1974-78 it was the "Mustang II", a rinky-dink little car, which even tried to rip off the Trans Am with a "King Cobra" model. Combine "screaming chicken" hood bird (73-81), 455 (7.5L) V8 (71-76), 400 (6.6L) V8 (70-79), and WS6 performance suspension, and a back seat (unlike the Corvette) and the Trans Am (and Formula) were the best deal in town for performance in the 70s, bar none.

Formula vs. Trans Am. The Trans Am has always been the extroverted, flashy, ostentatious model. The Formula has been the sedate, subtle model - all business, all performance, no pretention. Always available with the top engine and suspension – it was even possible, some years, to order a Formula with a better engine than the standard Trans Am engine. And in 1987-92, the Formula lacked the ground effects which made the Trans Am look fat - the auto equivalent of cellulite. A neater, trimmer, svelte look. All the better.

Acceleration vs. Top Speed. People whine about performance cars: "you can't use all that power!" Sure, you're not going to use anything over 90 mph in this area. But they confuse acceleration with top speed. We don't need, and can't use, that extra 20 mph from 120 to 140. But we can use an extra second 0-60. From stoplight, to merging on the highway, acceleration does make a difference in day to day driving. It's a difference you can feel in normal driving, particularly when entering traffic and getting onto a highway from an onramp. And a car that accelerates well is far more fun to drive. Finally: you can drive a fast car slowly, but you can't drive a slow car fast.

No one is going to mistake me for David Hasselhoff. The car doesn't talk to me, doesn't have Turbo Boost, won't go 300 mph (no production car will), and the black paint has seen better days - and isn't bulletproof. One of these days I'll get a new paint job (the current one dates from 1998). But it still does the job well. That's what matters to me.