Hearing Aids

Recently we caught AC/DC on what will probably be their last tour.   A concert originally scheduled for March 2016 was postponed six months to September, and longtime vocalist Brian Johnson was replaced – for this tour – with infamous Guns N’Roses singer Axl Rose.  It turns out that Johnson, who had weathered 36 years of touring with AC/DC, lost his hearing not from touring, but from his side hobby racing cars.  D’oh!   Contrast that with Pete Townshend, whose hearing loss is directly related to those full power Marshall stacks behind him.

My hearing has always been subpar, even before we moved to Paris in 1979, and well before we started going to concerts (1984).   I’ve never seen The Who in concert – was never that much of a fan.   I’ve seen Motorhead a few times, but the loudest concert was actually Y&T at Jaxx in 2002 – that was actually painfully loud. 

Originally my ambition was to attend the US Military Academy, aka West Point, and become an Army officer.  Life had other plans:  my hearing was below military specifications.   This also disqualified me from ROTC, the National Guard – as a private – and even JAG (military lawyers) as the JAG recruiters refused to waive the hearing requirement even for a non-combat role.  

Eventually I wound up getting hearing aids, the newest set of which I finally got today.   This pair can be calibrated and tweaked by – guess what? – an app.  We’ll see how they work.  The prior set, also purchased from Costco, lasted about five years before the left one crapped out.

I recall one set which fit in the ear itself, filling up the entire space.   The next set went down inside, with a small antenna to pull them out.  The current format is behind the ear with a bud going into the ear canal, plus a small rubber earpiece. 

With eyesight, glasses or contact lenses will bring you back up to 20/20 vision.  Unfortunately, hearing aids are not the same.  They take  you from abysmal hearing just up to marginally less than bad.  However, they do make a big difference.   Listening to music, for one, is a remarkably more pleasant experience with them, as they pick up the higher frequencies I’d otherwise miss.  Without them, music is muddy and dull.    Plus hearing all the awful noises my car makes as it gets older is another benefit.  And of course, hearing people talk, especially if they’re not standing right in front of me. 

 

The other major necessity is being able to hear in court:  the judge, the witnesses and/or parties, and opposing counsel.  Lately more courts have hearing assisted devices (e.g. Fairfax and Loudoun), but unfortunately this is more the exception than the rule.  I had a trial in Loudoun County a few years ago and the device worked perfectly in a huge courtroom: I could hear the Judge, the witnesses, the attorneys, everyone.  Hopefully the new ones will help for those courts, the majority, which don’t.   We’ll have to see.